Counter Intelligence

Like any parent, I always expected that some of the values that form the crux of my existence would be passed down to my child in the womb. A penchant for bad puns. A love of good food. A general sense of direction in any kitchen. Don’t get me wrong: I never wanted to breed my kid to be a Michelin-starred chef. I just sort of expected that any child of mine would be baking his own birthday cupcakes by second grade.

That doesn’t seem likely. Ever since my son Graham was born seven weeks early, he’s progressed slowly in almost every way. It took him 29 days to learn how to eat. He began to crawl a full year later than most kids. He was waaaay behind his peers when it came to sticking his fingers in electrical outlets. Ditto for throwing food. And today, at nearly three years old, he still can’t stand on his own. So in our little red leather notebook—the one that starts with a list of my first trimester food cravings—we record inchstones, not milestones.

Click here to read more on how Graham and I are learning how to cook together. The story was originally published at Leite’s Culinaria.



Filed under recipe

3 responses to “Counter Intelligence

  1. Einstein didn’t talk until he was, what, four?

    Milestones are crazy things. It’s intuitively obvious to the most casual observer that people are different. She’s 105 pounds soaking wet, he’s 250. He’s 5’4″, she’s 6’2″. She likes contemporary pop, he’s into speed metal. Sushi eaters vs Weber devotees.

    So why in the world does anyone think that two people should learn the same task anywhere near the same point in their development?


  2. Cassidy

    Beautiful post. As I wipe a pregnancy-induced tear from my eye, I can only hope that I can face whatever challenges my own child will bring into my life, be them little or large, with as much strength and ingenuity as you have. Thank you.

  3. Agreed. Beautifully written. Parenting a 3 yr old is hard enough, but parenting at that age with so many unknowns ahead of your child adds a layer of complexity to the whole scene. That patience you talk about, waiting for him to do things at his speed, will help tremendously.

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